Let’s face it, if there were a global Olympics for small talk, Australians would be on the podium, waving a VB stubby in one hand and a sausage sanga in the other. Germans? Well, they’d probably be filing a formal complaint about the lack of structure in the conversation.

Small talk is one of those things that seems simple until you’re standing awkwardly in a room with someone who expects you to comment on the weather, your weekend plans, or what you do for fun (fun?!). For Germans, this often feels like being asked to perform interpretive dance in public. Aussies, on the other hand, make it look effortless. But why? Let’s explore the cultural divide with humour and honesty.

The German Mentality: “Why Are We Talking If There’s Nothing to Say?”

German communication tends to value depth, clarity, and purpose. The idea of speaking just for the sake of “filling the silence” doesn’t come naturally. If there’s no real information to exchange, many Germans would prefer to stay quiet.

“I once had a guy in a supermarket queue start chatting about the price of tomatoes,” says Lukas, a German living in Brisbane. “At first, I thought he was trying to scam me.”
This suspicion is real. In Germany, strangers don’t typically start conversations unless there’s a clear purpose—maybe you’ve lost something, or you’re in immediate danger. Chit-chat about how the day is going? That’s suspiciously vague.
There’s also a deep cultural respect for privacy. Asking someone what they do, or what they’ve been up to, can feel intrusive. Germans tend to wait for relationships to deepen before engaging in what Australians would consider everyday banter.

The Aussie Small Talk Superpower

In contrast, small talk is the Aussie way of saying “Hey, we’re mates.” It’s friendly, effortless, and often hilarious. Whether it’s the barista, your neighbour, or a tradie fixing your roof, Aussies will throw a “How ya goin’?” at you with the casual flair of a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat.

It doesn’t require a real answer either “Not bad, mate” is usually enough. Small talk here is not about exchanging facts; it’s about exchanging vibes. It’s a social handshake that says, “We’re cool, everything’s good.”
“I asked an Aussie colleague how he was, and he said ‘Flat out like a lizard drinking’,” says Franziska, a teacher from Hamburg. “I spent the next ten minutes trying to picture that.”

Structure vs. Spontaneity

Part of the struggle lies in structure. Germans like rules—even for conversations. This is why dinner parties in Germany often feature in-depth debates about politics, philosophy, or sustainability (with a PowerPoint presentation if you’re lucky).

Aussie small talk, meanwhile, is more like jazz, improvised, flowing, and occasionally ending in unexpected places.

“You could be talking about the footy and end up discussing someone’s failed Tinder date,” says Max, an Aussie expat who lived in Berlin. “In Germany, that sort of topic jump might trigger a system error.”

Weather: The International Small Talk Gateway

Ask any German what the default small talk topic in Australia is, and they’ll likely reply: the weather. And they’re right.

“It’s hot today, hey?” is the Aussie equivalent of knocking on the door of a conversation. Germans, however, only mention the weather if it’s abnormal enough to be studied by meteorologists.
“In Germany, you don’t talk about the weather unless it’s actively trying to kill you,” jokes Anja from Stuttgart. “In Queensland, apparently ‘warm, sunny, and beautiful’ still warrants a daily discussion.”

Efficiency vs. Connection

Efficiency is a cornerstone of German culture. This includes language. Sentences are crafted for clarity, not for colour. Conversations should be goal-oriented.

Australia, however, places high value on social harmony and friendliness. Small talk is less about transferring information and more about building trust and rapport.

This can lead to culture shock. A German might think: “Why are we wasting time?” while the Aussie wonders: “Why is this person being so cold?”

Aussies Say “Mate”—Germans Say… Nothing?

One of the most endearing and confusing parts of Aussie culture is the word “mate.” It’s used with strangers, friends, shopkeepers, and even dogs. It instantly softens interactions and signals friendliness.

Germans don’t really have a casual equivalent. Sure, there’s “Kumpel” or “Alter,” but those aren’t thrown around nearly as liberally. Germans might just get straight to the point—with no cushion of “mate” to soften the blow.

“I once asked a shopkeeper in Berlin how his day was,” says Jess from Sydney. “He looked shocked and said, ‘Why do you need to know?’”

The Awkward Pause Dilemma

Aussies will jump into a silence with a joke, a question, or a light comment. Germans, meanwhile, are often fine with silences. In fact, it can feel rude to interrupt someone’s peaceful quietude with a comment about your weekend.

This can make group conversations a comedy of mismatched intentions.
“You’ll be in a room with a German and an Aussie,” explains Daria, a cultural trainer. “The German thinks the Aussie is being shallow, and the Aussie thinks the German is being rude. They’re both just doing what feels normal.”

Can Germans Learn Small Talk?

Absolutely. And many do. With time and exposure to the Aussie way, many German expats develop a healthy appreciation for small talk. Some even come to enjoy it—especially once they realise it doesn’t require them to reveal their deepest fears or solve climate change in one sentence.

But it’s a process. The key is understanding that small talk isn’t a waste of time—it’s the warm-up act to more meaningful conversation. It’s not always about the weather or sports; it’s about signaling openness.

In Conclusion

Germans aren’t bad at small talk—they’re just using a different operating system. Aussies run on “connection mode,” while Germans run on “efficiency mode.” Once both parties understand this, the humour in their differences can become a bridge rather than a barrier.

Aussies can appreciate the thoughtful depth of German conversation. Germans can learn that a quick chat about the weekend footy is a kind of social glue, not a waste of time.
And sometimes, with a few steins and a bit of sunshine, everyone meets in the middle.
Prost to the quirks that make us all unique!